Sunday, January 27, 2013

Whoooo wants to build a SNOW FORT or SNOW MAN?!?!?!?!?!?!!??

SNOWMEN, SNOW ANGELS & SNOW FORTS, seem to have been the big thoughts in my mind all week long. And while I know the snowy and cold weather was influencing my thoughts, I am surprised at the excitement I felt by the winter wonderland like weather, considering that i only ever think weather like this is allowed during the Christmas season. And as we can all tell through the cold, snowy weather that is not supported by Christmas carols, decorations, lights and cheer, the holiday season is long gone. So where this excitement is coming from, I have no clue. But regardless, I have to admit that IT FEELS PRETTY AMAZING TO BE THINKING ABOUT BUYING A PAIR OF SNOW PANTS AND GETTING OUT THERE TO PLAY!!!! In fact, I woke up this morning surrounded by pillows and a few choice stuffed toys that seemed to take the shape of a fort around me and I couldn't help but giggle thinking that I MUST HAVE BEEN PLAYING IN THE SNOW IN MY DREAMS :) It also made me want to build the fort that I am sitting in now, as I write this post. GOD I LOVE BEING SILLY :)

It's crazy I think because while getting lost in thoughts of being child-like and playing in the snow, I think about my life, my age and how for so many years I have seemed to be in this rapid rush to grow up, to get things done, to make sure I have all the boxes checked and signed so that i can get my pass to responsible adulthood. AND FOR WHAT I ASK? For someone to look at me and say congratulations you are now ready to be an adult? You know one of those people that owns a house with a two car garage, that's filled with stuff from pots and pans to bedding and housewares, that sits around and talks sophisticatedly about books, films and worldly events. RIGHT, DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE?

I will admit that a few years back I went to Africa to teach primary school and it was on this trip that I had my first inklings of really wanting the life of a responsible adult - the best friend, the wife, the mother, the everything in between.  I spent nights thinking about my life and the age I was and the timing that seemed to make sense. You know the timing that would give my parents piece of mind and allow them to live their lives freely, the timing that would make the most biological sense and the timing  that in my mind seemed to be the norm. I came up with a list of things I wanted to do, before it all happened and embarked on the journey to get it all done - signed, sealed and delivered. Only along the way I encountered so many bumps, that it made me really sit back and think whether I really wanted it all and what in fact it was that I was looking for. And that's when I decided to just box myself in by my professional goals, climb the corporate ladder and forget having to face all these life questions. 

And then in the midst of living in my comfortable box, life happened. I was slapped by one of the most amazing things ever and it opened my life, my heart and my mind up to that child-like person that I had kept safely hidden inside my boxed in life. And with that I began to live a life that was balanced between love, fun, happiness and anxiety. Anxiety, over letting the walls of my boxed in life be open and realizing that the clock that I had set for myself didn't matter anymore because I was on the right path and that eventually it would all happen. It's a scary thought I tell you, to live beyond your comfort zone. To realize that the things you only dreamed of are happening right before your eyes and yet while you couldn't be happier, you are overwhelmed by the pace that life is taking and the fears of everything that you have held onto since your childhood. You wonder if you are doing the right thing, if you are making the right choices, if you are living the right path. You are constantly surrounded by a state of confusion and fear of whether you are alone in the process you are going through in your mind and if anyone will ever understand, not judge you for it and be willing to listen.

And the truth is, ITS COMPLETELY NORMAL. And as I wake up today, thinking of snowmen, snow angels and snow forts and sit boxed into my own little mattress fort I realize that being an adult isn't about being the things that you think everyone wants you to be. It's about having the courage to define WHO YOU WANT TO BE  - Silly, Child-like, Goofy, Ambitious, you name it - AND REALIZING THAT IT ALONG WITH SO MANY OTHER THINGS YOU COULDN'T HAVE EVER IMAGINED WILL BECOME A REALITY and FAST

Life is going to happen and it's going to happen so fast that it will cause you to do, say or make decisions you later want to undo, re-think or forget. And while we will all be overwhelmed by the speed of life, we will blessed with snowy days, that are meant to allow us to put on some snow pants, take a break and have some good old fashion school yard fun :) 

Happy Sunday Y'all! Hope you all get to build a fort today!!!

Monday, January 21, 2013

To LIFE'S UNEXPECTED events that leave us feeling as awake as an ICE BATH WOULD...

And suddenly it's Monday all over again. Where those precise 48 hours called the weekend go no one really knows, all I can say is from the moment you scream "WOOOT!!! ITS FRIDAY!!!" it seems only like a blink of an eye before we are all graced with the Sunday blues, realizing that another work week is upon us. None the less, I have started off this week with a spunk in my step either because of the exhilarating run I finally went on after a two month hiatus or because of the inspirational presidential inauguration stuff that  I drowned myself in all day.  This week I feel WILL BE GREAT :)

Now with that being said, I am not about to take a morbid turn with this post, but I do have a rather somber story to share, one that will likely take you all by surprise, but that will hopefully leave you all feeling inspired to make changes in your life. 

And so the story begins. Today as I reminisced with a great friend of mine, I was asked if I had heard the news about an ex-colleague, one that at a moment in time I had hung out with quite a bit but in the chaos of life had lost touch with. So my obvious reply was no, last I heard was that she recently moved to New York City over the holidays to set up shop with the love of her life. I was correct with what I thought, but the latest update that was not. 

So upon arriving in New York to set up shop with the love of her life, this young 30 year old beautiful woman full of so much excitement began the process of settling in. In the mix of doing all the regular settling in stuff, she decided it would be good to find a family doctor. Very quickly she found one, made an appointment and began the process of just getting a routine check up. On this check up she complained of recent memory loss and head aches, things she attributed to the stress of moving, however the doctor thought it would be best to check things out. Well, thank God for that. Within 24 hours this young, hopeful 30 year old female was informed that she had stage 4 brain cancer. 

Now, I will pause before I continue, mainly because i get choked up thinking about it. But also because I wonder if you all think the way the i do, which is - THIS STUFF NEVER HAPPENS TO PEOPLE I KNOW, THESE ARE THE KINDS OF THINGS YOU READ ABOUT IN THE NEWS OR HEAR ABOUT THROUGH FRIENDS OF FRIENDS. And while, this wonderful and inspirational female is not my bff, she is someone that has graced my life and the lives of many of my closest friends. She is also my age and much like me a vibrant, positive, happy female full of hope for the future and the next stages of life. So HOW I ASK, HOW COULD THIS EVEN BE POSSIBLE? HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN TO SOMEONE SO AMAZING? AND WHY AT THE AGE OF 30, AM I ALONG WITH MANY OF MY FRIENDS STRICKEN WITH THE  WORRY OF LIFE BEING OVER TOO SOON. I mean i know we all recently joked about the world coming to an end thanks to the Mayan calendar, but that concept of embracing life seemed so different than what it felt like today when I was told this story. I mean hearing all this really started to ring truth behind all those phrases like "hold onto the ones and things you love", "live each moment as if it were your last", "never go to bed angry" and so on. It made me think and question the current state of my life and what in it was worth it and what just didn't seem to matter anymore. It also made me sit back and wonder if all the people that mattered to me, really knew how I felt and if something were to happen to them or I tomorrow would we exit knowing how true the feelings, thoughts and emotions were. And I know that I believe inside that there is time to close up loose ends and say the things I need to say to those I love, but the reality is this story rings truth behind the idea of - YOU JUST NEVER KNOW. So yes, it is clear to assume that hearing this story today, made for the type of day that leaves you thinking and analyzing the current life you lead.

Now with all this being shared, I would like to report that this amazingly inspirational female has undergone the necessary surgery to have the cancer removed. And while her future is looking brighter, her fight is far from over. This will be a one day at a time type of battle, but one she will never have to face alone thanks to the amazing support she has around her. 

So you see, there is a positive twist to this. One that leaves you feeling almost lucky to be alive, but also full of wonder of what really matters. I know I rant a lot about embracing and living in the moment and I truly stick by my words, I just hope you all use this story as a chance to reflect on the important and little things in life that matter to you. Along with the people that have touched your heart, made you smile and laugh, brought you to higher places and really showed you the meaning of true friendship, love and/or family. 

And with that I dedicate this post to one amazingly inspirational female, while sending out all the positive vibes I can. 

Thank you to everyone who has held my hand, made me smile and laugh inside and out, given me an amazing hug, helped me understand the things that have mattered and really just helped me embrace life. I LOVE YOUUUUUUU and all the things you all have done for me :) 

Happy Work Week ahead :)

Friday, January 18, 2013


Have you every just spent 10 minutes of your day with your mind completely shut off? And I don't mean disconnecting from the world by engrossing yourself in TV, music, a good read or a substance of your choice, I mean really just sitting there and staring blankly into space, with out a thought in your mind? I know the idea seems absolutely crazy and probably completely unattainable, but really have you ever tried? Do you think it's even possible?

Believe you me I know how crazy this seems. I remember being in my first, second, third and even my fiftieth yoga class, laying in Shavasana thinking to myself "Huh, Hi God, I think I am supposed to shut my mind off during meditation as I lay here, but there is one problem….I have no idea where that switch is!!! Sooooo instead, let’s have a conversation about anything and everything until someone in this class has enough balls to get up so I can follow suit :)". Now, with all the yoga I have done over the years, you would think I would have gotten the hang of meditation by now, but the truth is whenever I think I have gotten it, I catch myself almost about to snore and realize that the line between sleeping and shutting my mind off is very blurry.

Therefore, with realizing that my attempts at learning to meditate had failed and understanding that this is something I have really wanted to learn and try, I finally stopped talking about wanting to do it and actually promised myself a couple months ago that I would make a solid effort and learn. And with that I opened up google and entered in "How to meditate" and began this process. Now, really the Internet is a database full of weirdness which is what I got back as I attempted to scroll through all the things Google had found for me. I was overwhelmed, frustrated and confused with which path or link to follow and wondered if i would ever stop reading about meditating and actually be able to do it!!!!! And than i JUST DECIDED - THAT'S IT!! I am going to give myself 10 minutes a day to actually attempt to meditate. That means, timer on, mind off, outside world goodbye! And with that i BEGAN :)

Now there are way too many techniques that i tried in my attempt to find one that worked for me, but i will tell you that 60 days in, I am up to 20 minutes of meditation every morning and it has made a world of difference. Usually, my alarm goes off every morning and immediately i hate the world. I have grown to love sleep so much, that it’s almost like the sound of depression ringing through my veins when my alarm sounds in the AM. And that feeling is still there, but I no longer snooze, instead I wake up, assume my meditation position and begin my 20 minutes. And at the end of it, it is amazing at the state my mind is in and the way my days have carried out since i started. A person, like me who gets anxiety pains from pretty much anything - i.e. a random phone call, someone asking how I am, receiving an email from someone that could have bad news - has learned to just let go. Physically and mentally as much I want to i can't worry about the things i have no control over anymore and at the same time, having that 20 minutes to just clear my mind of everything, has really just put everything in my life and world into perspective in a crazy but amazing way. It’s strange i tell you and at times when I laugh or smile at things that used to drive me absolutely bonkers, I catch myself immediately running to a washroom so I can look myself in the mirror, give my cheek a slap and wait to see if I am really actually alive or if I have become this odd smiley robot person, lol. Its been an oddly refreshing experience I tell you and one thatI THINK ALL OF US NEED TO TRY.

And you don't just have to take my word and advise for it!! Just try a google search " The benefits of meditation" or dedicate 10 minutes of your time to watching this TED talk that I came across last week that talks about the importance of dedicating just 10 minutes of your day to doing absolutely nothing -

The beauty of this - is that there is no right or wrong way. You can follow any method that works for you, but the point is that YOU NEED TO TRY IT!! Remember how I talked about us running shoe folks being in a constant state of running, well i have come to learn that this is the first step in slowing down a bit and really gaining the perspectives you need to at least RUN IN ALL THE RIGHT DIRECTIONS.

And so now - WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR!!!!!!!! Just try it, if not for the benefits you could gain at least try it for the comedic relief of what your first few attempts will be like, LOL.

Happy meditating and Weekend Y'all :)

Sunday, January 13, 2013


First of all I want to start off by saying, JUST HOW EXCITED I AM to be writing this post, from my very new and amazing lap top :) Succumbing to my point hoarding ways, never felt soo good!!!! I am in complete aww of my brand new baby that is completely equipped with its very own special edition Marc Jacobs casing. That's RIGHT, momma got her baby some designer clothes, before she got some for herself :( sigh, I guess this is the price I pay for being a slave to my writing equipment :)

Anyhow, getting to this post and the topic at hand, I KNOW WHAT YOU ALL ARE THINKING - "This song is about 3-5 months too old, for me to be dedicating a post to it". And while I agree in some regard, I would argue that we would all be in denial if we didn't admit that every time we heard this very song the larger part of us begin immediately bopping our heads and screaming out the chorus.  COME ON NOW - DON'T YOU LIE TO ME, YOURSELF AND ALL THOSE OUT IN CYBERSPACE. 

My new obsession with this song stems from images i now have of my Punjabi cowboy family screaming out the chorus as they dance in ways I think none of them thought they could. I mean imagine it - aunties, uncles, older cousins and younger nieces and nephews all clothed in the latest Indian fashions, foreheads graced by bindi's and heads and arms covered in multi coloured turbans and bangles, as they all scream and shout some crazy Korean dance song and attempt to imitate the oh so famous dance moves. I'm pretty sure I witnessed muscles being pulled and asthma attacks almost being head and in the chaos of it all I'm positive I got bopped in the forehead and stepped on umpteen times. Cuts, bruises, ripped Indian clothes, LOL, all worth it in the name of PSY. I mean I am pretty sure i have woke up a billion times this past week, giggling of images of the chaos this song ensued in a room of over 1000 Indians all screaming out the lyrics with their multi-version Indian accents. 

So with this experience under my belt, I am now 10000% confident with saying that PSY may turn out to be a 1 hit wonder for this song, but he has definitely ensued a phenomenon that is quite amazingly infectious.  Now my rant is WHY THE HELL DIDN'T I THINK OF IT?!?? Or my even bigger one is WHY THE HELL DIDN'T SOME CRAZY PUNJABI GUY THINK OF IT AND RELEASE THE DAMN SONG!!! 

I mean I know PSY has some moves, but seriously, Bhangra moves are soooooo much easier to pick up, a better cardio work out and definitely more fun!!!!! I can even imagine the music video having references to our famous dance moves such as the light bulb, towel and sweeping the floor. SO COME ON YOU MUSICAL PUNJABI'S GET ON IT!!!!!!! I am tired of these 1 hit wonders in other languages coming out! I actually want to be able to say the words and know what the hell I am saying or least be able to fake it by turning on my Indian accent and blending in, LOL. So many other cultures have jumped on this bandwagon and I think its about time we jumped on, wouldn't you say so????? INDIANS, OUR ACCENTS, AND OUR DANCE MOVES DESERVE A CHANCE AT BEING A MUSICAL PHENOMENON THAT SWEEPS THE NATION :) I am not attempting to be a hater on those that have perfected this 1 hit wonder business, but am definitely promoting that us Indians also deserve a chance at this popularity. 

And with that I am gangnam styling my way out this post and wishing you all a week full of a lot of head bopping, chorus screaming and good old fashion bootay shaking. 

Til next time :)

Thursday, January 10, 2013

HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII, HELLLLOOO?!?!?!? OH, it's going to be one of those days isn't ?!?!?

Ever had one of those days, when you wake up and face the world and everything seems to set you off? You know when someone says "Hello, HIIIIIIII, Love You, How are you" or basically anything alike and all you can think of saying in response is a nice and pleasant F*** OFF. Don't act like y'all don't know what I am talking about! It's those days when everyone is a serious a**hole or b****h, even if they did absolutely nothing to you and/or did everything right instead.

And no, I am not having one of those days, God I don't even know where this profanity is coming from since I am in a sincere Zen state after mokshaing my way to a blissful evening. But today, I did get thinking about this very idea, after having a call with someone at work who basically spilled the beans on a personal situation affecting a colleague. Now in all seriousness, it isn't someone who I particularly favor, however hearing about their situation, made me immediately think of some of the reactions they had displayed recently and it made me realize why they were reacting the way they were. And in a matter of seconds, I felt sympathetic to what they were going through. All and every single one of my thoughts moved from complete annoyance to wanting to pick up the phone and ask how they were or run to them and give them a hug. And it's not pity, because I do not play the pity game, it was a genuine feeling of  "oh man I wish I knew and hadn't been such an A**HOLE back!!!"

Now I am not saying that it is okay to treat people like complete ASS when you are going through a hard time or dealing with something personal, ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY COULD HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IS EVEN GOING ON INSIDE YOUR MIND!!! I mean I think of the poor Toyota Repair man that had to deal with me while in my stressed GMAT studying state and I want to send him flowers or punch myself in the face....okay wait I do not want to punch my beautiful face, lol, but a bitch slap perhaps would do. The point is, HE HAD NO CLUE, why I was being so incredibly difficult, when inside my head all I could do was count down the time that I was losing out on studying while he talked me into circles.

So no, I don't agree that it is okay to treat people poorly when you are going through stuff. But I do NOT agree that we should have to walk around with a sign posted on our heads that says something along the lines of:

" Hi my name is Arti, and today I am dealing with (insert list here) and will as a result likely be a complete and utter B****H to you. Therefore it is best that you either steer clear or be understanding of my weird behaviour, THANK YOU :)"

Therefore, I do agree that we all deserve a grace period. I mean don't y'all be reading this post thinking you ain't ever done a single douche bag thing in your life. And yes that is me personally pointing my finger at you. Think about the nice gestures you let go unnoticed - you know emails, texts, calls or cute little notes - or the tim horton's staff you were rude to or anything alike on your bad days, WE HAVE ALL DONE IT. That's why I think we all deserve a grace period and we deserve an "it's okay, just don't freakin do that again", when we are sane enough to recognize our poor behaviour and apologize. I mean let's be realistic, for every bad day we have there is about 100 good one's, so its unfair to be judged on he basis of them.

I don't know maybe this forgiving nature I seem to be inheriting, is stemming from my new years resolution to really honor and believe in the good in everyone I know, have known or come across. But I really do think that there is a lot of good in everyone, even our worst enemies. And the truth is, today was evidence that you really have no idea why someone acts the way they do half the time. I mean half the time we don't even fully admit, why we are acting the way we are, since we tend to keep things to ourselves. Which in all fairness is completely normal, because we are scared and/or afraid of admitting the things that really have us tied in a knot. Therefore, to judge, be mad or downright angry at someone for having a few bad days in a row isn't necessarily fair.

So as I end this post, I am saying a HUGE AND MASSSIVE I'M SORRRRRRY, to everyone out there that has been affected by one of my bad days and in return am saying an even more massive I UNDERSTAND AND ITS OKAY to all of those whose bad days I have been the brunt of. I'll even offer up a free hug to seal the deal :)

And yes, now to all of you in cyberspace it's your turn to do the same :)

Til next time!!

Monday, January 7, 2013

HEY HEY!!! YOU OUT THERE!!! What is your Value Proposition?

I'm starting off this post by thanking a very good friend that had the ability to take my post on being fearless and throw it in my face when I sat in my cute little apartment contemplating what to do with my life late last week. Thanks to that very slap, I lived one of the best experiences of my life, which included booking a plane ticket and flying out of a completely different city in under 12 hours, setting off an alarm, making some unlikely friends, bonding with some of the best of the best in my life, buying one of the most amazing dresses I have ever owned, dancing my face off, laughing so hard that my stomach hurt and standing up to a ticketing agent with unevenly died red hair that deserved more then a few of my choice words. None the less, I have returned to life and am recovering from a lack of sleep, but am full of happiness based on the decision that I was forced into making :) And I promise you there is a thread that binds this experience with this post!!!

So as I lived the gong show that was this weekend, I had the joy of listening to a few speeches one of which came from a very cute old man. In this speech he talked about how everyone in the room at that time, had come together for a reason and that we were all special in our own unique way hence creating the experience that everyone was having. And while I got what he was saying it wasn't until I finished the Monk who Sold his Ferrari on my flight home that I started to think about what he was saying. I mean we all know we are "special" i.e different, wacky, weird, lol. But what is it exactly about us that keeps the people around us, around.

I think the one thing i have always struggled with is understanding the value/uniqueness/flare that I bring to the world and to those around me. And I get that we don't have to necessarily be doing something for someone all the time to bring value, so really then its about understanding what in consulting speak is known as our value proposition. And not for an application or a job or interview, but rather for life in general. Its about being able to answer the questions about WHO THE HELL WE ARE and WHAT MAKES US SOO SPECIAL and SO PERFECTLY IMPERFECT? And of course since I had a VERY LATE AND LONG ASSS DRIVE HOME! I had the chance to really let this simmer and in the wee hours of the morning really come to terms with my value proposition and the one thing I value most about the people around me.

You see, I'm a listener. And yes I know I am also a witty, goofy, know it all talker, but that isn't what defines me. Instead what defines me is the fact that I listen to everything that is said and unsaid. I pick up on all the little things and things that go unnoticed and am always the first to ask - if you are okay, if you need to talk or if you need to just share something stupid, funny or crazy ass exciting. But this innate quality is what drives home my value proposition - My ability to really get the little things in life. I'll never be the one that buys an expensive gift or sends flowers or does anything extravagant. But I will be the one to bring you your favorite chocolate, show up with a cupcake, organize events, be that ear that you need in good and bad times, draw you a picture or make you a scrap book or really just get the goofiest thing I can to make you laugh. This is me - Arti Kashyap, Value Proposition: God of the little things in life. LOL, i can't think of a better non-cheesy phrase, it is late and I am working on little sleep, so work with me people. Anyhow regardless of what makes me special, I can tell you that the value proposition for those in my life are their imperfections. I love that the people I surround myself with are full of insecurities, weaknesses, fears and weird quarks. It inspires me to embrace my imperfections and really understand that we are all a work in progress. I never expect perfection from anyone as a result and value that those around me understand that i too am perfectly imperfect.

So with that I leave you all, with the big question: What's your value proposition? What is that uniqueness that you bring to the table? And what is it that you value most about those in your life?

Til we meeet again :)

Wednesday, January 2, 2013

FEAAAARRRRR!!!! Damn that MONK that sold his Ferrari!!!!!!

"The only limits on your life are those that you set yourself." And FEAR is one of those factors that creates limits, stopping us bold in even the most amazing tracks, by forcing us to back down from some of the very things we have wanted most in our lives just because we are scared of the unknown, the worst happening or just not being able to keep it together.

I know i know, I have been on a bit of a writing hiatus thanks to the holiday season and now here I am returning with a deep and crazy vengeance LOL. Its not my fault I SWARE!!! I blame it on that damn Monk who sold his Ferrari. Don't you all know him? If not its my new latest read, one that was suggested to me many years ago that I never seemed to pick up. Then on a holiday shopping trip to Chapters, I came across this Monk and decided to give him a chance. And now I am stuck, completely knee deep into this book and unable for the life of me to put it down - well with the exception of writing this post and cooking up a crazy Indian storm. While this book resembles stories like the Alchemist, it has a way of hitting home, since it is centred around a workaholic lawyer that is really similar to us Running Shoe Era folks - Someone who is in a constant race to obtain that next big thing.

And while it would seem that because we are so ambitious fears would never enter our mind, the truth is that a lot of times we are running from one thing to the next - that big move, the next big gig, the next promotion, the next big party, etc. - because if we stay in one place for too long our fears kick in and we are immediately paralyzed. And you all may think I am crazy for assuming we have fears that can literally paralyze and cause us  to act in crazy, unimaginable ways so that we can avoid looking in the mirror at ourselves and saying I AM SOOOO F***ING SCARED, but it's true!!!!! And I will be the first to admit that I AM DEAD SCARED OF A LOT OF THINGS. I mean life isn't easy and its scary and I find the older I get, it's harder to live like a naive child that's soo open, trusting and unafraid.

There are so many things that cause us to get scared - the future, commitment, history repeating itself, childhood scars not going away, responsibility, confrontation, life, you name it. And the older we get, let's face it our baggage affects us. Everything we have gone through in our lives, leading up to this very moment has scarred us, it's made us afraid to trust new things, people and places that we know deep down are good, plough through the hard times and really give everything around us a chance. And all these scars do, is hold us back from having the things we want most in our lives. Instead we hide in our ambitions and goals that bring materialistic things to light and hope that we can push things, people and places away as we run from our fears for as long as we can.

BUT THAN BAM!!! Like a massive slap in the face, your fears hit you when you least expect it and than what? Will you just spend your life running and pushing things away? Because at some point it has stop.  

So with realizing that at some point it has to stop, I have made 2013 my year to be completely and utterly fearless. I'm still a bit shaky - come on its only January 2nd!!!! - but have made some shareable progress that I hope inspires you all:

- I have FACED my FEAR of Jean Shoppping!!! WOOOT!! And even came out of the store with jeans in a size I haven't worn since I was 12. DOUBLE WOOT!!! (Insert crazy happy dance here, lol). And likely found a new shopping obsession.

- I have FACED my FEAR of Using Points!!!!! This was a tough one, I tell you. But I did it. I cashed in close to 1k worth of points between airmiles and Deloitte stand-up points to buy me the perfect lap top that I have always wanted that will keep me writing through the Clinton Foundation, NYU and anywhere else the world plans to take me. Now understanding all the lingo that I need to in order to buy this lap top is a whole other story - GLADLY open to help and suggestions here. LOL

- I have fearlessly decided to believe in the good in all people, including myself. We all make mistakes, say things we don't mean, act in erratic ways, and do things we wish we didn't but I have chosen to believe in people's genuine nature including my own. Because I know when I say I'm sorry, I love you, thank you and all that other sappy stuff, I mean it, which leads me to believe others do as well.  

- And lastly for now, I have decided to fearlessly believe in the things I choose because I just know, like I've never known before that some things are just meant to be.

And with that I leave you all. May you all realize that you are not alone in your fears and that they are definitely shared. Embrace them, share them and do the things you need to do to make things right, because running from them will have to stop at some point, so why not be crazy, act impulsive, be fearless and just believe :)

Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it. -- Bill Cosby

- Now back to the Monk :)